When You Add a Little Snow

The weather has finally begun to freeze. Almost overnight it went from around 10C to 0C to -17C. And I love it. Last night, I was freezing, so I put on my fuzzy socks and my hoodie and snuggled under three layers of covers. It felt really good. I love this weather. I love the warm, comfy clothes that bring back memories of family and childhood. I love the glistening snow that frosts the trees. I love the cold fresh air that is invigorating and painful at the same time. It's WINTER! It's Christmas!

This morning was truly a lazy morning. I just wanted to stay huddled under my blankets. So, I did. I slept in, and then when I felt like it, I got up and piddled around on the computer. Around noon I started cooking lunch. Noodles with a Caesar/Tarter sauce and chicken. Yummy! I also made and drank a liter of hot green tea. While I ate I watched some old sitcoms on my computer.

I feel so happy to be here in this place right now. Before I came to Russia I had all of the usual worries. What if my apartment is a dump? What if my company screws me? What if something bad happens back home? What if? What if? What if?

Fortunately, everything has worked out well. I have a charming (if small) flat. My company is decent. I enjoy most of my coworkers. And Russia is amazing. Like any country, there are ups and downs. Like any jobs there are ups and downs. I've come to accept the fact that life is one crazy screwed up roller coaster. Which is why, on perfect mornings like today, I am going to appreciate them fully. Sometimes, all we need to put life back into perspective is a few blankets and a nice cup (or four) of hot tea.

And maybe a little snow.

Fake It Till You Make It

I'm not a naturally upbeat and enthusiastic person. I want to be, and sometimes I am, but my natural mode is reserved and quiet,sometimes depressed sometimes quietly content. This tendency in me has come to bother me more and more. Like I said, I want to be one of those happy-go-lucky persons that people are drawn to. In fact, I usually gravitate toward them, hoping some of their spirit will rub off on me.

Before almost every class I teach, I hear an old saying of my old voice teacher, Cindy. "Fake it till you make it." She would always tell me this whenever I was in a bad mood, but had to sing or practice or do whatever anyway. "Fake it till you make it." For some reason this, out of everything she ever told me, has stuck with me. I've found it means even more to me now that I'm teaching.

In today's society, the word "fake" has such a negative connotation. It's often synonymous with insincere. But for me at least, "fake" has taken on a whole new meaning. I'm not talking about changing my personality or character to fit in with a crowd or to manipulate (well, maybe manipulate, but in a good way). Rather, I'm talking about faking my apparent emotions and feelings in order to make the people around feel happier and more relaxed so that they can enjoy learning.

I hate going into class with a bad mood or feeling tired or depressed. The last thing I want is for my classes to feel I'm taking my personal feelings out on them. So, I "fake" it. As soon as class starts I'm jumping around, changing my face and voice tones, doing everything I can to get my students to participate and enjoy the lesson. During the 45 or 90 minutes of class, I'm a stranger to myself. The thing is, "faking" can actually lead to "making" it. By the end of class, I usually do feel somewhat better (most of the time). And, I think overall, most of my students appreciate the crazy me instead of the more subdued or angry me they would otherwise get.

The thing is, it is really frustrating when I pour out all of this energy and enthusiasm (which I really don't have), and it comes back unreturned. I mean I make myself exhausted every day just to try to help them a little. But then I get those classes where everyone just sits and answers questions with one word, and they drive me absolutely crazy. Of course, sometimes, if you push hard enough and refuse to move on, they'll comply with some amount of grumbling. But still, it makes me feel awful - especially since they're adults. I mean, I expect it of teenagers, but adults? Their seeming apathy makes me feel useless. I didn't know if I was even getting through to them.

The thing is, the class itself isn't bad. I really enjoyed almost everyone in there. But there were three different levels within the one class level. The advanced students were already brilliant and didn't need me, and the struggling students continued to struggle. They laughed at my "enthusiastic" antics and complained about the lessons after class sometimes. It got to the point where I had to ask if someone else could take them.

So today, I told them that next class they would have a new teacher. I almost started crying, because I did have a couple special students in the class I enjoyed and I knew liked me. Several students asked me why. Evidently, some of them, some of the students I thought were merely tolerating me, actually liked my "faked" attempts at enthusiasm. My craziness and bizarre behaviour appealed to them. I have to admit that it relieves me to find out that I did make a small difference - albeit unknowingly. Still, what's done is done. Hopefully they will learn and grow more with a new teacher. Hopefully they understand that it is not them personally that made me move.

Sincerely,
Your Russian Traveller

Because I'm in Love (or Obsessed)

Caution: This post has almost nothing to do with Russia, but I had to include it because I'm obsessed and in love.

I am so in love right now that I just had to write about it, despite it's next-to-nothing relevance to Russia. Josh Groban just released his latest album, Illuminations. And, I completely understand that I just showed you my inner nerd with the last two sentences, but I don't care!



I remember when I first discovered Josh Groban. My parents had his CD stashed away among their collections, and I came across it one day as I was rummaging through their things (before you judge, you should remember that parents give up their right to privacy when they have kids). I saw the CD with his face on the front, and I admit, his gorgeous face drew my pre-teen attention (I was only like 12 or 13 at the time). I listened to it a time or two, liked it and put it aside and forgot about him. A year or two later, I came across the CD again and fell completely under the Josh Groban spell. Seriously, J.K. Rowling may as well have invented something for it, because I was mesmerized. I especially loved the song "Vincent."

Fast forward several more years later and you find me as the proud owner of the self-titled Josh Groban, Closer, Awake, Noel, the single from the soundtrack Troy Remember, and a couple of other random singles. (I still have to get the soundtrack to Chess that he did though.) And now, now I am the even prouder owner of "Illuminations: Deluxe Edition!" You could plausibly call me obsessed, but I whole-heartedly claim it to be a healthy obsession.

So, a little bit about Illuminations.
Illuminations was unlike his other CDs in many ways. To begin with, most of the songs were written by Josh Groban himself. This means they are more personal, and the CD has fewer covers (which I adore). Secondly, the goal of the CD was to be more real and less perfect. He tries more things with his voice that his more classical songs shy away from, such as falsetto. You also hear less of the typical "adult-contemporary pop" beats and more of a random mix of sounds like African drums. He even has one song "The Wandering Kind" that is completely instrumental (I think I read that he wrote it when he was around 12).

In addition, the publicity for this album has been crazy. I am a follower on facebook, so for the past several months, I have been receiving updates and early single release notices. Many of the songs were released to the public early through singles and music videos. They were like mini-teasers, making you long for more. I became obsessed with the new album after I heard the early-release of "Hidden Away." Then to ice the cake, Josh Groban had the entire CD up for your listening pleasure a day early on facebook. So, last night I stayed awake listening to it for hours, determined that I would buy it on iTunes as soon as it was released in the US (although due to technical difficulties, I was about an hour behind schedule at the time of purchase).

I love this CD! It is by far one of his best! Below are listed some of my favorites from the album.

1. Bells of New York City - the first song on the album that completely blew me away last night. I love the passion and darker musical undertones.

2. Galileo - I means seriously, who else can get away singing a song about a random dead astronomer. Although different in music and intentions, it reminds me of his cover "Vincent."

3. War at Home - Listen to it. Now. Beautiful. And remember this is the singer who did the greatest version of "I'll be Home for Christmas" due to its military undertones.

4. Hidden Away - As previously mentioned, this is the song that made me obsessed with buying this CD. The lyrics alone make me melt.

5. If I Walk Away and Voce Existe Em Mim - both slightly eccentric (at least compared to his usual) musically. If I Walk Away has more of a plucked-string approach. Voce Existe Em Mim is his first Portuguese song and uses African drums.

6. The cover of "Straight to You" - Just beautiful and heart-warming.

Other Favorites by Josh Groban (or as I like to refer to him: My future husband)

In no particular order
1. So She Dances
2. February Song
3. Broken Vow
4. Remember
5. My Confession
6. Now or Never
7. Hymne a l'amour
8. Vincent
9. Never Let Go
10. Mi Mancherai - I'm melting again

So, do yourself a favor and buy his latest (or any of his) album(s). Listen and feel your entire body melt into one gigantic puddle. Guys, if you aren't in the melting state-of-mind, buy it for your girl and let her melt into you. Seriously.

Sincerely,
Russian Traveller

P.S. Please note that the whole obsession tone of voice should be taken as a joke. I definitely appreciate amazing musical talent, but there should be no cause for concern that I am going to turn into some creepy stalker with stacks of magazines and a couple of glue sticks.

Moscow Explorations and Revelations

Thursday and Friday of this week (November 4th and 5th) were holidays here in dear Russia. Fortunately, a public holiday means I didn't have to work. Excitement over in my corner!! Anyways, this lovely lack of responsibility meant that I actually had time to be productive and have adventures. I won't bore you with the details of Thurday's activities because they were fairly mundane and headache-y (picture a GRE studybook and a marketful of fish).

However, Friday was a different story filled with, as my face book status reads, "dragons, cathedrals art, art that's not-so-much art as a kid with a paintbrush, McDonalds, Christmas trees, masks, stereotypical construction workers (evidently its an international thing), wrong streets, right streets, underground streets, clowns holding people by the legs, and much, much more."

Kayla and I met at Central School around 1 and then headed to McDs to plan our adventures. We decided the first site should be the MARS art gallery/museum. Let's just say that the getting there did prove to be half of the adventure. We got off the metro and wandered across the park in our chosen direction. Along the way we came across way too many kids, a statue of a clown holding someone upside down, a horse, a statue of a man in a skirt slaying a dragon, and a restaurant called Mr. Burrito that had pictures of giant pretzels. The MARS is slightly out of the way and in the middle of a typical European street which was surrounded by construction workers. Oh, and by the way, the stereotype for construction workers in the US is not specific to the US. They will whistle and holler internationally. But the museum was worth it.


The museum was relatively small, but filled with a variety of projects. Three rooms contained architectural/interior designs for offices. Some were exceedingly cool. Evidently, it IS possible to have your own bubble. And, you can even work in a hamster wheel if that suits your fancy.






There were two rooms with more contemporary art which were really impressive. Giant hands, banana peels, masks, 3-D bodies, etc.



From the MARS we made our way to a metro station and then to the Red Square area. Instead of venturing around the actual square, we expanded our horizons. Our route took us pass the parliament building and a statue of Moscow's founder. We also passed the Bolshoi. After a while, we ventured into a book store, but found nothing to our satisfaction. Venturing further we explored one of Moscow's oldest buildings.

This building is fantastic. It has been turned into a very ornate and touristy super market with a small souvenir shop in the back. But the architecture, the interior design - BREATHTAKING! I had to buy something there, so I ended up purchasing a chocolate truffle bar and green tea.





From the supermarket we traversed over to the Arbat and hit up Dom Kenegi, a bookstore that has a wide selection of English books. I ended up with a copy of Homer's The Iliad and The Odyssey. It should keep me occupied for a while.